I Will Survive!

Now we are very close to the end of the semester. This semester has been most challenging and difficult semester because having six classes (three are honors related classes) beside participating more than 100 hours of activities by honors society, and working as a math and accounting tutor at the college. I have been spending longest hours of all in this class, but always I have been fighting with time. Reading and writing takes so many hours from me. I am very slow reader and writer even though I have improved so much in this class. Therefore, I often cut my sleeping hour to compensate the time, 2, 3 hours of sleep per night, or even 30 minutes of sleep per day occur. I honestly very exhausted physically and mentally. Then my current situation does not favor me. My dad just came from Japan visiting me for the business, and I have to accompany him 3 days this week. Even though, it is nice to see my dad, honestly I feel this is not a good time. For instance, yesterday, I had to pick him up at LAX, taking him to Claremont with traffic, and coming back to Lancaster from Claremont 1 AM, and still trying to do the home work to catch up. It is glad to receive scholarships, but convocation on Tuesday and tomorrow (Friday) just make me nervous of running out of time. Going to the Shakespeare play for the class tomorrow night supposed to be fun, but I am sure I will feel awkward. Then accompanying my dad on Saturday and Sunday make the situation very hard to manage my time to do school works. I just feel like to give up everything and just go to sleep to catch all the sleep I missed!! However, my dad told me that he sleeps on average only 4 hours a day even on weekends due to his work even though he is 60 years old! I am actually little bit worried about him if he is going to be OK doing so for many years. Many people in Japan die through too much hard work. I am much better off because I am not going to be like my dad for many years, but doing so for just this semester. So I should be able to do it.

I should try my best and keep cutting back sleeping hours in order to achieve best work possible. I have survived until today academically, and I still have hoped to maintain 4.0GPA in total more than 120 units I am going to have at the end of this semester. I cannot give up my dream of accomplishing this so easily. Result of my four years of college being fulltime student is going to determined in this 2 weeks! I will do achieve it! I am not going to give up!

My reality in research project is maybe poorest. I honestly reveal my status. I just bought Lolita by Nabokov few hours ago to read it and it has 300 pages. I feel so ashamed for being this status, but I do not regret of this result because I have always worked hard to do all academic and volunteer works, it’s not result of just being a slacker. However, this reality is very harsh for me. I read around 10 pages per hour; it takes 30 hours to read. Then I have to upload 5 pages based on reading until this Sunday. What I have to do is just read as much as possible without wasting any moment. I should have such attitude to accomplish this. Thus, I will bring the book when I accompany my dad, every moment I can read a book. I know that only 2 weeks left from to finish this semester. After doing my best, I will be proud of myself, but if I fail to do so, I will stick with my regret. I am mentally motivating myself by saying “I can do it” “I can do it!” Yes, sure I can do it! I will try my best! Please wish me luck and I will wish all of you luck as well. 2 more weeks! We can do it!